My Child and I

Thursday, July 25, 2013

Bittersweet Heart Break. Part 1 (True Story)

When I was in secondary school, I dreamt of being a wife and a mother. I desired so much to fulfil this dream that I was practically willing to marry the next guy that asks me out when I turned 30 and there still wasn't a man in sight. I didn't care what he was, I felt I could always make the best of any man that I met if only he'll ask me to marry  him. I was afraid that time was no longer on my side and I might end up never living my dream.
I met about 3 different guys within that period but these guys were so below expectation that they weren't even worth dating how much more marrying, besides, it was quite obvious to me that these men weren't after marriage but after sex and I wasn't ready to be any man's sex toy, so I moved on with my search for a marriage partner.

Finally, at 31, I met this guy. He was the sweetest guy ever, he wasn't my kind of guy ordinarily but I just liked a lot of other things about him and before you know it, I overlooked all the other stuff I didn't like about him and our relationship blossomed into a beautiful one. It was one of the best I'd had for a long time. As if it wasn't sweet enough, barely 3 months into our relationship, he asked me to marry him. I was so excited, ecstatic will be an understatement. I was already looking at what our kids will look like, how we'll be happy together forever, what a great wife I'll be and what lovely children we'll have. At the time, James was 35 and I knew he was mature and knew what he wanted in life. He'd dated a number of women and I just knew he understood how special we were together.

I introduced him to everyone in my family and met everyone in his. A date was set for a formal introduction and I was above the skies with joy when he finally came with his family to see mine. 

Truth be told, James wasn't the 'perfect' guy but I loved him in his roughness. He didn't have a steady job or a steady flow of income, he was quite messy and he didn't seem to have gotten a lot of things together at 35. Inshort, he was still living with a friend and had a very battered and old car. None of these things bothered me. I just knew we'll work through all these things easily with my happy and carefree nature. 

So, the formal introduction was done and a date was fixed for the wedding, but then, things went from very good to bad.  James suddenly became hostile towards me, he suddenly got too busy for me and didn't have my time. He didn't see any reason why people have white weddings and he didn't know why he should attend marriage counseling classes. My happy self suddenly became a sad wreck, I suddenly became someone who cried easily, but even at that, I went on with the wedding plans. I loaned him money to rent an apartment and started putting the apartment together for our lives together.  

This is just part 1, check this space tomorrow for the concluding story.

2 comments:

  1. Madam, I beg, where's the 2nd part of this story? I've been waiting since yesterday for it.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Is there ever going to be a concluding part?

    ReplyDelete